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LATEST BULLETINS FROM BRUSSELS EUROZONE 12 (ENGLAND) EDITION |
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AT LAST - ROVER DEFEATED! Street parties erupted in Brussels last night as it was announced that the British car maker, M.G. Rover had been eliminated. For years this company continued to build cars which looked nice on the outside, and contained Wood and Leather on the inside. In clear breach of Article 534336 Subsection A: "All motor vehicles shall only contain interiors made from plastic in the following colours: Black, Very dark grey, Dark blue, Light grey posing as silver and Lightish grey-blue". Rover's refusal to stop using Wood in its cars was a clear threat to sustainable forestry, and the Leather seats where offensive to Muslims |
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RACE-HATE EXTREMISTS Rover's 75 model continued to attack Islam by sporting a "Union Jack" on the side near the back doors, this Racist flag is highly offensive to all Muslims, and is used by various Racist organisations such as "The Bank of England". Yesterday another Racist organisation, the "Classic Rover Owners Club" added insult to injury by turning up in their hundreds at the Longbridge factory in an array of outmoded and outdated cars which should have been melted down years ago. They continued to drive around the factory, wrecking the environment with their unregulated exhaust fumes and poisoning little children by using their horns which could possibly be filled with DDT and Asbestos. A Racist spokesman for the club said that "Rover is part of British heritage, its sad to see the last volume car manufacturer go". "British Heritage" is a phrase used by Racists which is directly intended to offend Muslims |
Vile: A car designed to offend Muslims |
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PEADOPHILES Last night, Lionel Griffin, a top MEP from Zone 12, was celebrating. "Finally, this blight on the face of the Euro Project has been removed" he said. "Next we must pass laws to outlaw all 'Classic cars', which are out of date, polluting and Muslim-offending machines kept on the roads for the sole purpose of killing children. Finally we will be able to pass new laws to ban all cars over the age of 15 from the roads, and finally eliminate dangerous activities such as 'Steering', entrusting this task to a central computer which will also log all journeys people make, and take pictures of the car's occupants, to prevent Peadophiles and Terrorism." |
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