THE GUN - THE ORIGINAL VERSION

Book 7: Train Trouble

This story is one of the worst ones of all, the art is decent, but its an incredibly blatant rip-off of the film "Broken Arrow", and has a lot of idiotic moments, and nothing is really explained. It starts with Gunn, Jackson, and two other guys driving along in a desert somewhere (presumably America) in a pickup truck. A TV camera with a gun that fires darts (yes, I mean like the ones used in the game darts) comes out of the sand, spots them and shoots the tyre on the truck, 4 frames in and the stupidity is mounting up! XD. Gunn intelligently looks at the air escaping from the tyre, creating a miniature dust storm, and asks "What's wrong?", the driver reliably informs him "The tyre", great isn't it?

While the driver jacks up the truck a strange helicopter with a jet engine instead of a rear rotor blade comes along and starts shooting at them with twin heavy machine gun/grenade launchers, which blow the truck to hell, and kill the one guy still in it. Gunn and the driver run away, but the driver gets a load of bullets right through him. Gunn leaps into a nearby dry river bed, or something of the sort, and fires a grenade as he goes, then before we even see what happened he goes "Won't miss again!". 3 grenades later (Oh, so it can only store 4 grenades now? how can it store 4 if it fires 7 different types? but then it fires at least 3 kinds of bullets but only has one magazine). Anyway, having failed to hit the chopper he goes down deeper into the riverbed/canyon thingy and opens a box of grenades to reload, when Jackson comes along, announcing she has a plan.

She comes out and goes "Don't shoot!", yeah like the pilot would be able to hear her, and he presumably has no room or need for prisoners anyway. That said he does start to land, or at least stays still long enough for Gunn to fire. The chopper blows up and by some miracle Jackson doesn't get killed. Surely there are better plans to destroy the chopper than that, like AIMING PROPERLY! Later on Gunn walks round a corner in the canyon and just finds a Nuke JUST LAYING AROUND. It has "Eat Nuke!" written on it, and some weird logo, I cant even remember what the logo was supposed to mean, I think it had something to do with the "Three nations war", a vague conflict which was supposed to have happened before world war 3. Since The Gun has been inserted into the Felney world, and I came up with the new backstory, this war is now one that happened in 2011 between Norway, Switzerland and the EU. But back to the main story, the control panel on the top of the nuke looks EXACTLY like the one in Broken Arrow, how more blatant can you get?

Meanwhile at some Stealth Force base, someone holds up a print-out with a fuzzy blob and an arrow pointing to it, probably some kind of 'radiation scan' which they used to find the bomb, and goes "Commander, we found it!", at the exact same time as Gunn? What are the chances! A helicopter that looks just like the one Gunn and Jackson had in book 2 turns up, but now it is on the enemy side, TWO soldiers get out, couldn't they spare any more to capture a nuclear weapon? These two immediately arrive at the canyon and start shooting at Gunn, as far as they know he is dead, so how come they knew he was there? He

shoots mini-fireballs and kills one of them, I only made him use them because he hadn't for a while and I didn't want readers to forget he had them XD. He takes out the other bad guy with no trouble, and Jackson find their radio, which she uses to call a M.A.S.H truck. Like I said I used to think that was just a general name for Army medical facilities… well, maybe it is, but I imagine most people would immediately think of the show XD. At least this one looks like it was made this side of 1914. They load the nuke onto it and drive off, but a Stealth Force Hummer starts to come after them. Their command tells the driver in the Hummer that Gunn is with the nuke... how could they know that?. A bloke in the back seat of the Hummer mentions its a mash truck, so they cant shoot at it, so the driver says "We're only going to steal it", before ordering the gunner to shoot at the tyres. So the gunner immediately shoots at the roof- does nobody follow orders around here? Jackson, who appears to have lost her arms temporarily, recommends that Gunn shoots back, while the driver says there is a 'Ridge' ahead, they drive over the ridge, and Gunn chucks the nuke out the back, I cant think why. The enemy gunner finally does hit the tyres and the truck rolls over and comes apart, right next to some train tracks.

Gunn comes around and is taken prisoner on the train, but they sit him up against a rifle with a bayonet... handy that such an antique would be JUST LAYING AROUND in the locomotive of a train in the 2020's eh? Gunn escapes within seconds and knocks out the guard, before shooting him. In the background it can be seen a display screen on the wall in the cabin says "Not in use", just like on the second engine in the film "Under siege 2", dunno why two of them would be necessary here, this train has 3 carriages. Gunn climbs onto the roof and shoots someone up there, blood flies out of him in huge blobs. Jackson is sitting in another carriage next to the nuke, Gunn swings down from the ceiling and kicks a man guarding her, before they both climb up to the roof, and Jackson shoots another guy up there. They make their way to the front of the train, and shoot the driver through a small window behind him, gun chucks in a 'Grende' and the front of the train explodes, killing someone else in there who is never seen, just heard. They run towards the middle carriage, which has one of those small helicopters on, which they use to escape. The end! (What happened to the gun?).

Extra: GUN of the month, a picture of The Gun, this shows that it has some kind of fluid in the flamethrower cooling coils, the Grenade Launcher now has 3 settings (Low, Medium and High), and the Gun and Flamethrower both still have 3 settings. The ammo counter on the gun reads 10,000... how small are the bullets?