THE GUN - THE ORIGINAL VERSION

Book 10: Arctic Battle

This one as supposed to have a proper storyline this time around, with more "talky bits" before all the death, though of course it wouldn't skimp on the action, and to prove this there is a nuclear explosion on the first page! Gunn is serving with the Navy again, on a ship called the HMS Illustrious, which has ran across a huge iceberg and for some reason cant be bothered to sail around it. So Gunn shoots a nuclear bomb into it and the explosion splits it in half, allowing the ship to sail through. Just because I said it would have more talky bits, it doesn't mean it'd be any more intelligent XD.

The shockwave from the explosion knocks a helicopter out of the sky, which crashes on the iceberg. The crew of the ship assume its Gunn, but then he lands on the helicopter pad, so they investigate the crashed chopper and find out it's an enemy one sent to spy on them. The Captain meets Gunn and tells him that the missing helicopter means that the enemy may attack the ship, to which Gunn says "Don't worry sir, the 'ole valour could stand up to anything" XD. Later Gunn is shooting at targets with a toy gun, when someone asks for him and he shoots his sticky-dart-thing out of the window, which has a notice reminding people to close the windows in the event of an atomic attack XD. Gunn goes up to the bridge in time for the Captain to say that some enemy planes are about to attack.

The Wolf Force jets go up to attack them but then some secret Stealth Force stealth jets come down and blast them, with the fighters distracted the Stealth Force bombers start strafing the ship with machine guns, turning some guy into mince. The ship fires a missile back, which blows one of them up. The Stealth Fighters have finished off the Wolf Force planes and start attacking the ship as well. They cant be shot down because all the missiles on the ship are guided by radar, so Gunn gets The Gun and fires a heat seeking grenade at the Stealth's. One gets blown up and the nose cone sticks into the other one, which gives it an oil leak, so the pilot bails out and is captured.

Meanwhile at the UN building, which has been relocated to "Somewhere", a very hairy commander tells nobody in particular that a big fleet will be assembled to attack the hidden Stealth Force base. In the canteen of the HMS Valour a few weeks later Gunn, Jackson, Jake (token black guy), Cara Loft (Lara Croft-like twin pistol wielding sharp shooter) and some other cannon fodder people are sitting around a table moaning about how they dont get enough food, so want to change ships, along with some hilariously cheesy 'macho' talk. It is also revealed that Cara Loft killed somebody called Uri in Berlin, whoever he is.

The time to attack has come and loads of soldiers pile onto twin-rotor transport helicopters (which look more old fashioned than the pointy ones in the early stories). A big swarm of these helicopters flies over the ice fields when loads of 'dumbfire' missiles are shot up from the surface in a big cloud, which is like that bit in starship troopers where the blue stuff is being shot at the spaceships. A few of the helicopters get blown out of the sky but most of them make it through, The pilot in Gunn's one looks back and shouts "We're land-urk!" as he is shot by bullets bouncing around in the cabin. A guy with two UZI's is shooting at the chopper, so the co-pilot shoots back with a pistol and hits him.

The chopper half lands-half crashes and everyone piles out, Gunn strafes across 3 people who emerge from a hidden stairwell, before him and a few other people go down it. A private gets over excited and charges ahead, getting blown away by an automated sentry gun at the bottom of the stairs. Gunn and Cara both dive to one side and hide behind some pillars, wondering what to do. Cara jumps out backwards, shooting with twin pistols, and takes out the camera on the Sentry gun. Gunn sets his grenade launcher to "Makimum" and blows the door off the command centre, ripping somebody apart and setting him on fire. Gunn walks up to the door and says "Knock Knock" before spraying gunfire around the room, taking out 3 people and smashing up some assorted scientific equipment. As Cara and Gunn survey the gory remains, Jake looks out a small window and spots a gigantic Ant in a hangar down below, Gunn says "Heist", presumably a reference to the second level of Grand Theft Auto, which is called Heist Almighty XD. Jake calls up the other Wolf force people and tells them to come and check it out, talking in ridiculous 70's Ebonics XD. Meanwhile Cara shoots the ant with a sniper rifle. Jake says that the other squads have found the main enemy base further away, and this one is just an outpost, so they head over there, where a Command And Conquer 2-style camouflaged turret has a few people pinned down, including Jackson.

Cara and the other two climb up a hill overlooking it and she shoots the gun operator in the head, before Gunn shoots an incendiary grenade into the window, which sets the inside on fire and causes another guy to come running out on fire. Inside the base a soldier reports to a Stealth Force General called, er, Leors (that's what it says!) that the turret was destroyed. Suddenly the main entrance (you know that because the door says "Main Entrance" on it XD) is blown away, and the people inside rush to defend the base, spraying gunfire at the first Wolf Force people to come in. The enemy general climbs onto a little monorail thing and takes off, while a Wolf Force guy blasts at the defenders with a rocket launcher, causing them to fly everywhere and get bits of jagged metal stuck in them. Gunn rushes in and spays bullets across a gantry, wiping out two more guys. He calls Jackson and "Tom" (who died in several rejected stories but kept coming back XD) to follow him and they jump onto one of the little monorail things too, going into a huge greenhouse-like structure with a forest in it (eh?), which is surrounded by gigantic mounds of snow.

Some guys hiding in the forest start shooting at the monorail, missing it but hitting a small metal pole holding up a giant girder, which smashes into the monorail car, and nearly knocks it off the track. Gunn uses the big machine gun on top of it to blow away the enemy soldiers, before it does fall off the track and lands in the forest. Gunn gets out and looks around, shooting another enemy who appears from the undergrowth. Then another giant ant attacks, so he shoots that as well, The three of them walk along when Tom gets picked up by a giant flying ant and is dumped into a group of them to be ripped apart. Gunn and Jackson shoot at the ants and kill them, but it's too late to save him. They eventually walk to the edge of the greenhouse and Gunn smashes some windows and chucks a tracker out into a snow mound, telling the Valour to send out bombers to drop napalm on it. The guy on the other end going "Ok, but you're crazy, not me!" XD.

Gunn and Jackson run up some stairs to a small 'station' where the other monorail thing is, but the enemy general takes Jackson hostage. Luckily she is a soldier and not some stupid screaming woman out of 60's Doctor Who, so she knocks his teeth out and sends him falling down the stairs, he sprays something at them saying that it attracts the giant ants. The ants start coming out from the trees but just then the napalm strike gets dropped on the snow mound, which melts it and makes a huge tidal wave of water flood in to the greenhouse, which flattens the forests. The enemy general is in the water, along with some of the giant ants and a few other bad guys (another monorail has came along by this time and falls off a gap in the rails into the water). The water is starting to freeze again, or at least is very cold, which is killing the general and making him thrash around, but Gunn shoots him in the head anyway. Him and Jackson stand on the station looking at the scene of destruction, and waiting for the water to freeze again so they can get out. A number on the wall of the greenhouse says its number 3, implying there is at least two more in this vast, city-like base, which the bad guys somehow built in total secrecy...hmm XD.

Back at the HMS Valour, Gunn goes to see the general, who tells him they have new orders-they found where Stealth Force's leader is hiding! So Gunn says "Yes! Lets go!", and then it says "The End, for now- Whatch out- the final battle is coming!", except book 11 was never made, so it didn't XD